Tuesday, February 21, 2006

enough is enough

I read this morning that Britney Spears' husband, Kevin Federline, is tired of being in the shadow of his famous spouse and thus is planning to release a hip-hop album in the spring. 'K-Fed', as he is affectionately known, says that he has collaborated with BS (in this case, an appropriate moniker if ever there was one), but, in his words: "I'm not going to put the songs on this album because it's like, 'Respect me first; then I'll show you what I've done with my wife.'" A tantalizing prospect indeed (if by tantalizing you mean stupid, boring, and painful).

Now, my beef here is that he is only getting an opportunity to do this because of his status as Mr. Britney Spears. His wife is musical product and he is product by association. He is a product being advertised by a product (if that makes any sense). It seems to me that these days any famous twit feels like it is their God-given right to put out an album and for some reason the masses agree, purchasing these by the bucketload strictly because of the novelty. Back in the day there was Joey Lawrence (the dude from 'Blossom' who always said "Whoa" in that completely idiotic way that teenage girls found so cute and sexy) and then followed William Hung (who could ever forget 'Hungmania'), Paris Hilton (she is too easy to make fun of so I won't bother), and now K-Fed. These are signs of the Apocalypse, I am convinced of it...

When I know so many talented musicians who can't get a break and get their art heard by the population at large and I see K-Fed, King of the Ten-Cent Tabloids, putting out an album it really makes me mad. I will guarantee that his hip-hop masterpiece will be one of the biggest pieces of crap released in 2006. But sadly it will sell millions. The only comforting thing is to realize that in 20 years no one will know who Kevin Federline is while the Dylans, Neil Youngs, and U2s of this world will be forever remembered for their contributions to the pantheon of pop music. Please realize that I am not doubting K-Fed's worth in God's eyes. He is a human being and has the right to be treated with as such, but I just wish that he would find something of worth to do rather than trying to be the next Snow. I'm out...

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